Thursday, January 10, 2008

Rebel Commando (ROTJ 1983-4)

Another in the long line of “army builders,” the Rebel Commando is another no-name Rebel Alliance soldier who gets beamed down to the planet in his red shirt and immediately killed. Wait, that’s Star Trek. I mean, he is not one the leads, so he either gets shot in the background, or he stands in back looking around for something to shoot. He doesn’t come up with the brilliant plan to use an AT-ST to lure Stormtroopers outside, and he doesn’t befriend the Ewoks by using the Force and floating an android. No. He is the no-name guy who tells his kids that he used to be in the Rebellion. "Did you know Luke Skywalker Dad?" "No, son. I saw him once, though." "Oh."

The Commando comes with a nice sling-over blaster rifle, a non-removable utility belt, backpack, and helmet, and comes in a lovely shade of green. Not a real green outfit, that's cruel. If plastics technology had progressed a few years, he would have been printed in camoflage green, but that would have to wait until the newer lines. He only came on an ROTJ card, because he is the man with no name.

Why should you own this figure? Five reasons:

1. Where else can you get a manly lime-green figure?

2. His gun is actually frickin' detailed for a generic Rebel soldier.

3. He's another figure that can stand in for a G.I. Joe in a pinch.

4. You need someone for those damn Ewoks to hang on while Han and Leia are getting the real fighting done.

5. Instead of Rebele Commando, you could make him EndorAssassin, sneaking up and killing all those Stormtroopers on the fringes. You need anger transference from those Ewoks, damn furballs.


I think I summed that up nicely at the top. No-name Rebel soldier on Endor. Does his job, goes home to his wife and 2.5 kids, and hopes that his daughter doesn't marry a Kowakian Lizard Monkey.


Rob Stradling said...

Respect for the Barenaked gag!

Manetoys said...

He's Soldier A!